northernlights,
I've heard others say that their LO knew them just before the passed. I was hoping that I could have that experience, but I didn't.

Northernlights - Perhaps she's remembering a dream or mixing up some facts and conversations that she remembers incorrectly. I would simply make an effort to draw her into the rest of the house in positive ways (food, music, entertainment, etc) and avoid discussing the issue. It's an illogical accusation and you can't reason with her.

I think there is an important distinction to be made between a hallucination and mis-remembering things. A true hallucination would probably warrant medication, and getting facts mixed up just comes with the territory. I'll give you a somewhat winded but similar example of mis-remembering in my house:

We had a cat die and got a replacement for my grandmother Laurette. She hated it because it didn't look the same and it seemed to make the pain of the dead cat even stronger. She insisted she wanted one that looked the same, so we started hunting. It was January, though, and most litters come in the Spring. We found one eventually, but it was feral and tagged to be put down at a shelter. We crossed our fingers and brought it home.

The thing was scared to death for months and lived under couches and behind book cases for a long time. It didn't eat much, peed all over the house, scratched me to bits, the whole thing. When we finally let it outside it didn't come back for days. At first Laurette only saw the cat when I dragged it out from behind something, and what she saw was a scared cat trying to get away. She assumed that I beat the cat, because why else would it be afraid of me?

Today little Miss Mimi is a slightly skittish but generally social house cat, but to this day Laurette is convinced that I beat her. It's not a hallucination, just a false conclusion drawn from misunderstood facts.

Like I said at the beginning, dodge the subject and do what you can to SHOW her the reality. Words don't seem to stick as well as actions.

Hi Jezza, Thanks for your post.
Unfortunately I get mis-remembering, delusions and hallucinations with my mom. I can stand outside her sitting room door and listen to whole conversations she is having with me and I know she thinks she sees me because she say something like "stand up straight when I'm talking to you" just as she did when I was a child. These conversations are real to her. We started her on Aricept and Ebixa (namenda) and they have helped quite a bit. I was pretty worried when she started with the temper tantrums resulting from the delusions but the meds have really helped with that too.
I usually can manage just fine with her but you could probably tell that when I posted the other day I hadn't slept well the night before. These things are always worse when I'm tired.
Today is a good day for me. Yesterday I was reassessed by the nurse with the Community Care Access Center and qualify for ten hours of respite a week, light housekeeping and help with my mom's personal care. This means that when I do go out with my husband I can come home to my mom's room cleaned and she will be showered and ready for bed. Hallelujah!!!
Our region covers a large area and there are about 6 nurses who oversee the home care for all types of disabilities. We get reassessed every 6 months. This nurse told me that I am the only client out of hundreds who has plans to keep my mom with me for the rest of her life. They don't even have provisions for the type of help I will need down the road. There is a hospice but you have to go there (just like a small hospital) and that is not what I want. I will now have to put in place a plan to hire nursing care when the time comes.
northernlights