Just checking on you. Hope everything went smoothly.

Thinking of you.

So sorry to hear about your MIL. I really don't go the board much any more. But thankfully Nancy let me know.

You have meant so much to all of us with your supportive words, great advice and outstanding courage. I know your sweet MIL is free at last and at peace.

GOD BLESS YOU

Mickie

Oh, Maebee! I am so sorry to learn of your MIL's passing. My prayers and thoughts are with you and DH as you deal with her passing.

Maebee,
Also checking in on you to see if your still sane!

Jackie

Maebee,
Just wanted to ask how you're doing. Take care and I'm thinking about you.

Well, things were weird, to say the least, Thursday. We got to the church about 45 min before the service. SIL and SO were in the library, where Mom's casket was. We went into the "dining room" area, where the church had set up a baked good buffet. We(we 4 + my Sis) were the only ones in there. Some of Hubby's co-workers came in, and one of his childhood friends. We and the Friend went to the library after refreshments, and there was a short prayers service(8 people total in there). We then followed the casket to the sanctuary, with Hubby, the Boys, the Friend, and SIL's SO bearing it. I could not believe my eyes. There were the co-workers, one other couple, another Friend's Wife, and THAT'S IT! SEVEN PEOPLE!?!?!?

The choir, that Mom loved so, sang two songs. Just beautiful! Her 2 best Friends are still in it.

Hubby said his words, and I was soooo proud! He thought he did terrible, because he choked up a few times, but it was something! He even mentioned when Mom rubbed my feet with lotion, when I was in the hospital, 8 months pregnant with "The Big One". The Pastor said many times, how he remembers how much Mom loved her Grandchildren. It was one of the most comforting eulogies I've heard. I was in a completely different frame of mind when we left.

SIL had the Pastor announce that she wanted to say some words but that she was "DISABLED"(!?!?!???) and couldn't get up there. Hubby did mention what SIL wanted him to, in his thoughts. She actually had the nerve to tell the Pastor, before we got there, that she had asked Hubby to say a few words for her, and he refused! Hubby reassured Pastor that that was not the case, and that he indeed, had included SIL's request. Pastor also warned Hubby that SIL tried to bring up "issues" with him, but that the Pastor reminded her that this was not the place to deal with them. We do not know specifically what her "issues" were, and did not ask, only reassured the Pastor that we had no intention of addressing anything with her on that day. It really seemed like everyone we met, through this whole thing, had some preconceived impression of us, and they seemed relieved to finally meet us. Am I making sense????

After the church, we all went to the cemetery(hearse + 4 vehicles). We did go to the chapel for a service for 10 people, then had to wait outside the chapel for almost 30 MINUTES, until the grounds crew finished with the deceased before us, so they could assist with our rites. We finally got to the grave, and had yet another service, then left before they started to put the dirt in. The Boys each took a rose, and tossed one in with Grandma. I am glad they did have chairs set up. SIL, my Sis and I were seated.

I had absolutely no discussion or acknowledgment with SIL, nor did Hubby. We took my Sis out to lunch with us afterwards, then went our separate ways home. I was so tired, I zonked right out, and slept until "The Big One" woke me for "The Little One's" choral concert. I had a whole 15 minutes to get ready!!!! It was certainly a welcome diversion, except the child sitting behind me had a terrible cough, and I think I caught something from him. It started yesterday afternoon on me. I feel terrible today! Throat, chest, nose, EVERYTHING! In fact, I think I'll go back to bed for awhile.

Soooo, now we wait for a few days, and see if SIL contacts us about the remainder(if any) of the estate. She will then get a surprise. I can't say much, you know......


MARCIE, you did indeed remember the most beautiful song I know! It did open the flood gates, which I have needed.

You are all so very very dear to me. You may not realize it, but your thoughts and prayers have been leaned on, heavily these past years, especially the past week. I will probably get back to reading and writing here, later in the week. I am having a hard time gathering my thoughts. It also doesn't help that, every time someone hears my keyboard clicking, they feel compelled to say "Whatcha doin'???" I can't wait until Monday, when I should have a good portion of the day to myself.

Hi again,
For some reason, when I tried twice to type this response, my window went to a "cash-for-gold" window. Oh well, seems ok now.

I wanted to address this separately, in case anyone thinks it should be removed. I saw and responded to the thread started by "rosie" in the other forum. I just do not trust her, and I really do not think she is sincere. I do know she reads here, and made a point to let everyone know that I had posted info here, and on Jim's blog, about my MIL. How considerate.

I DO believe it had something to do with when Jim's wife passed, even though I did not bring it to anyone's attention. If she WAS sincere, why point out that I had posted elsewhere? Why ask if anyone had heard form me, when she knew darn well that I had posted here? Why not address it here? Why not simply a condolence thread, like for everyone else? Am I being petty??
I really think I did not want Jim or any of the trio pretending to care. I'll respond again to it later today, for there are many wonderful thoughts there, from some lovely people.

Why in the world I posted in the blog, I do not know, other than I had glanced at the entry referring to me, and impulsively responded. When he says "And I send you condolences. But..." I feel the "but" in a sentence like that makes everything before it null and void.

Maebee, I'm so sorry to read about your MIL. You and your family are in my prayers. (((gentle hugs)))

I saw Rosie's post on the other board and was fuming but kept my mouth shut so that those who are sincere could offer their condolences. Actually though, the good thing is that several people found their way to this board through that post. Just proof that God turns everything to good.

Maebee,

I'm so glad that your hubby got to speak at his Mother's services. My husband did as well at his Mom's funeral and he was so choked up that we thought the words would never come out. His Aunt who we all adore just said, bless him, and then he did continue on.

I know how much you mean to us. And I know how much Marcie means to you and me as well. I will send her an e-mail and have her come here. She's not checking the boards right now, and she needs to hear how much you value her. If you have her address, it might be worth an e-mail.

Keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers,

Oh Maebee, I am soooo sorry, it sounds soooo uncomfortable, but I do understand, boy, do I "It really seemed like everyone we met, through this whole thing, had some preconceived impression of us, and they seemed relieved to finally meet us. Am I making sense????" "YES! Try APS, even The Police Department, and The Hospice Hospital, until they finally met me, and could tell, that I was not pure...evil?

I guess I am glad that Dad's Evil New-Now-Rich wife, didn't have any services at all. I wouldn't have gone, but I do feel bad for Dad. He deserved so much more than a cremation, no services, no obit, that seems just cruel. But, so it goes.

I am glad your hubby got to speak, he will be so glad he did, down the road.

That other board? I think it has 'battered women syndrome' attached to it. It some how pulls people back, for more abuse, I am not sure why, but I don't even take a glimpse, except for that short time, I was looking for people's quilt squares. It was worth it, and I am not any worse for wear.

You are BELOVED Maebee, here, and on that rotten old board. Go back, and collect your condolences, when you are feeling better, and stronger.

I can not ever even hear that song either, Maebee, without it tearing at my heart, and the tears always flow. It's a keeper!

Maebee,
I'll be going over to my sister's in the next few weeks. When I do maybe you, howdy and I can do lunch. When I/you feel up to it let's get in touch.. I'm not sure if I have you number, but I get in touch here.

I will be thinking of you

Geez Maebee, you have really been through the wringer. I can imagine what you really did want to say to SIL that day, but had enough respect and love for your Mother in law not too. But heck, the first chance that comes up, you really need to give her hell. What the heck is wrong with her. You don't think she's getting AD do you? Seriously, sounds like she may be loosing it.

For now, get your rest as this cold thing lasts awhile. I've had mine about a week and a half, and not feeling that much better. Doctor put me on an antibiotic because of upcoming surgery, but usually they would never. But it hasn't made any difference. Alot of hot tea, with a hall's cough drop in it. Add honey and a bit of brandy, and you're all set. It really does sooth, unless it just knocks you out. Oh and don't forget a bit of lemon.

As far as rosie...from...the...other forum, she really just wants the attention. I wouldn't give her the pleasure of any kind of answer from you and just thank the wonderful people that sent their condolences. They're the ones that are worth it. We know who the attention getters are and it's best not give them what they want. Anyone that comes to our forum is treated with respect and caring for them. But they must also give it back. We don't want to feed the one's that urk us. It's not going to be our style on here.

We know you, and know who you are, and love you being here. And if someone comes on here honestly looking for answers or just to vent, they will always be welcome. If there going to be just peeking to get info on us, then who looks bad? Certainly not us.

Now you get some rest and take care of that cold. It usually gets worse before it gets better. Just ask at least half of us on here who are or already going through it.

Take care.

Jackie

I just saw this - I'd love to do that when both of you are ready!