Get well soon,Jackie. I need your kind words and advice.

Joyce,
I just now got a chance to read your posts. Oh Joyce, it's really been rough on you the last few days. Gosh, do you wonder sometimes how you find the strength. I do often and I don't have half of what you have to do.

Just keep coming here and we'll try somehow to get you through this as best we can. You have taught me so very much, but now you are really teaching me strength that I didn't think I could ever have. Thanks for always keeping us updated on you and Bill. I don't know if you realize how much it really does help to know that we CAN do this.

Hugs to you my friend,
Jackie

Hello all,

I haven't been on here much lately, and I'm sorry. On new years eve night I threw up. During the day I had really overeaten this appetizer that my brother had made. It had onions in it that I usually don't eat, but it was sooo good.

On new years day, I woke up and felt like I had a golf ball in my throat. As the day went on of course it got worse and I started loosing my voice. By the next day, I couldn't speak at all. Called my GP and he saw me that day.

He thought maybe I had irritated my esophagus when I threw up. He gave me a script of an acid reducer to start neutralizing the acid. He said my throat looked good. But to be on the safe side he sent me for a throat x-ray. That came out negative.

He couldn't understand that I was so uncomfortable. It just felt like something was stuck there. The next day, it felt like my glands were swelling, so I called him and he gave me the z-pak. Thats the five day antibiotic.

I started taking it, but I have to say, my hoarseness was getting worse, and with my knee surgery coming up, I didnt' want to take any chances. I called again, and this time he insisted I see an ENT.

Long story short, I have a left paralyzed vocal cord. They put this tube down your throat through your nose that has a camera and light at the end of it. The ENT said that most times it just happens, and in most cases cures itself in time. But since I'm having that surgery, he sent me for a head and chest CT scan to rule out anything that may be pressing on the nerve that is near the vocal cord.

Had the test today, and probably won't find out the results until tomorrow. I have to see my ortho doctor tomorrow to start the paper work going and knee x-rays for the surgery, so I'm sure he will call and find out for me. If not, I'd have to wait at least two days for an answer from the ENT doctor.

I'm just hoping that my surgery will not have to be cancelled. I've had this scheduled since October. I still can't talk above a whisper, and I choke when I eat solids. The only good thing about that is that soup and pudding will definitely make you loose weight. Have lost 4 pounds already.

I've looked this up, and there are things that can be done if its not from anything like a cyst or a tumor. There's shots and other things. The doctor and I didn't talk about that yet as he wanted to find out what the CT scan shows.

I didn't want to come on here until I got myself in a better mood. Can't be helping people when you feel like the whole world just came crashing down on you. But today after having the scan, and seeing people in there that were going through far more than I am, I decided that if the surgery is cancelled, then so be it. I guess I can go through this pain in my knee for a bit more and get my throat fixed first if necessary.

So hopefully tomorrow I will find out everything. Guess I'll just have to keep enjoying my husband washing those dishes and doing some of the cooking and making me tea for awhile longer. (Oh how I hate to be waited on!)

Poor Mom has had to have everything I say translated to her from either GRanny Nanny or hubby. And boy it seems like since I've had this, she has wanted even more of my attention and has asked me many more things!

So, wish me luck, and a prayer wouldn't hurt either.

jackie

Prayer never hurts, Jackie. I've missed you and was wondering what was going on. I hope you get some news soon and that you start feeling better. I've never known anyone that had your problem. I've known a few that I wish they couldn't talk.

Waiting for test results is the worse. Does Mom understand if you tell her you don't feel well? If I tell Bill that, he will pat me on the head.

Just enjoy hubby waiting on you. That probably doesn't happen too often. My daughter says, make the best of the opportunity. Don't know if you were joking about not liking to be waited on, but I know I can't just sit and let someone wait on me. I have to be up and helping them help me.

Get better real quick. I miss you.

Jackie, we are all surrounding you with our love.
You already know how I feel about you my friend.

hey Jackie, we have been swapping emails but I wanted to just send you hugs and let you know I am thinking of you today and always.

Get well soon, Jackie!

Can't have you have no voice when you get that new knee... unless all you can do is scream from the pain of therapy afterwards...!

Oh gosh everyone, thanks so much for the get well wishes. Snicks, what a beautiful butterfly. And although hubby helps alot, I can't imagine him, like that cute bear, bringing me a tray with a flower on it!!! And Joyce, I wasn't kidding. I don't do very well being taken care of. Hate the attention. I had to laugh when you said I have to help them help me. Sounds what I do.

Well, got the results of my ct scan today. I have a very tiny non-significant lump in my Parotid gland. That's a gland that's in front of the ear. But that's not causing the paralyzed vocal cord.

I also have hypo-dense fluid (lesion) in my liver. Don't know what the hell that is, but doesnt' seem to be too significant either. I guess when they do a ct scan on your chest, they automatically get the liver on there too. Have a call into my GP to see if I need to have an MRI. But that also would not cause paralization of my vocal cord.

The scan showed no tumors in my neck or chest. So right now they call it Idiopathic which means no reason. The ENT said I can still have the knee surgery, but I'm kind of leary now as I know they stick a tube down your throat during surgery.

So as soon as I check with my GP, I guess I'll find out more. And I really am concerned about this liver thing. The ENT doctor didnt' seem to know alot about it, so I have to wait to talk to my doctor.

The surgery is Jan 26th, so I'm trying to get all this settled before I decide if I will have the surgery. If anyone knows of someone who has had this, the paralyzed vocal cord, let me know. Supposedly when its for no reason, it eventually clears up.

So that's where I'm at right now. Confused, mad, aggravated. I was really hoping everything would go on without a hitch with this surgery. I had care all set up for Mom, everything was so organized, and then this. Oh well, guess it could be worse huh?

Thanks again friends for all your get well wishes.

Jackie

Jackie, I'm not a nurse or anything, but the lesions on your liver are probably just cysts, many people have them. Don't worry about them if the doctors aren't worried.

I'm sorry to everyone, I've been gone. I went to Las Vegas for a few days. Before everyone says YAY! let me tell you that planning a vacation to somewhere my mom and I went often and had a wonderful time was NOT a good idea.

My thinking in doing this was that I always enjoyed Vegas and would lose myself in the gambling aspect, plus get some rest. Unfortunately, all I could see when I got there were the restaurants mom and I ate at, machines we played at a couple of years ago, a little casino she loved, etc. It just made me sad and I think I cried on all 3 days I was there, just for the fact that all the fun we had was with the old mom who could do all these things and not the one I have now.

Just a big ole mistake going there. As the plane was getting ready to take off to come home, I looked out the window at the Strip and thought "I can't come back here anymore."

Joyce, I posted on the other thread, I've got the both of you on my mind tonight.

Judy, my parents used to snowbird in Panama City Beach in the winter. Part of me wants to go back and yet another pat is hesitant. We had so many good times there as a family and I think I would feel the same way as you. I don't think I could go back to PCB and not feel the same way as you did on your trip. Sometimes it is better not to revisit a memory.

Snick, I think you're right. I really thought it would be great to go and it was just sad. If I felt any hesitation (like you do with PCB), I really wouldn't go. If I could have left the very next day without having to pay a big fee for changing the ticket, I would have. Lesson learned.

I just went back and read through the whole thing. A big hug to you all. I loved the Christmas hat story.

I thought I'd post an update, as things have changed somewhat. MIL has been on Aricept for two and a half years now, and I fear it is ceasing to work. She seems to be progressing awfully fast.

There were a couple of episodes last August that were startling that made us see that she'd taken a little jump ahead, but she settled down after that and we didn't notice any big changes. Come December our son was taking exams to graduate university, and she'd ask me even as late as February when his exams were, but if I told her, she'd say 'Oh! I remember! He graduated and he's starting work in April!' 'Right!'

Now, I have no idea when it happened but her memory has gotten SO much worse. I see her 2-3 times a week but it wasn't until she came and stayed here for a few days the week before that I realized that it isn't just our lives she can't remember but her own! I was really shocked and saddened by that.

'When I had my teeth done ('99), Taku wasn't born yet was he?' (the son that just graduated at 26)

'My mother died when I was in my early 20s I think, is that right?' (she really died in '79, when MIL was 52)

She spent the four days asking me questions about herself, her son, our son (when she wasn't asking for enemas). It was so hard to answer them matter-of-factly. So sad.


Question---these past few days MIL has been calling me in the evening (just had another call while typing this) about coming home. I just tell her 'As soon as I get the home helpers lined up' and she's fine. Another pattern is 'I don't know what's up with this place, they don't give me any medication' and after I explain to her that they do, she stomps off to the nurse station and they show her the empty plastic bags (little tiny bags she tears to take the pills) for that days doses, then she's okay.

Today's phone call was 'They brought me fish for dinner again tonight, I ate everything else and sent the fish back. They've given me fish every night for months now, how stupid are they? I'm going to get malnutrition! I feel like smashing up everything in my room!!'

Yikes. The phone calls started up 5 days ago, but they're at 5-6 pm so I've been taking them, and distracting her with something funny and been leaving her placated when I hang up. Tonight's anger is a new wrinkle, the threatening to smash things new too (or old really....she used to have humdingers of temper tantrums in her 50s and smash everything in the kitchen). Should I worry, or is it more than likely just tonight's mood as we've had nasty weather all day?

(Edited for clarity as I thought that two separate threads were one and the same)

Hey Friends, here comes an update about grandma... About 3 weeks ago she had a bad flu and stomach virus that left her weak and dehydrated. We end up calling EMS to transport her to the hospital after she lost consciousness one afternoon. After a few days in the hospital and more specific treatment she was able to overcome the C-Dificle infection. The doctor and my grandfather at that point agreed that she should be moved permanently to a nursing facility close by (less than 0.5 miles from home), so that she could have 24 hour care. My grandfather had hired a woman to help 24 hrs at the house, but she is not trained in nursing and my grandfather wasn't able to help her any longer because he couldn't lift at all after his back surgery 2 weeks ago. In contrast to how she was in day care about 1 year ago, my grandmother is actually tolerated the nursing facility very well. I'm just constantly worried that they don't over medicate her there, and that they are taking care of her well. I know how complacent many of these staff members can get having seen it first hand when I worked with the ambulance company. So that's it for now, I guess we have moved on to the next stage. How's everything with everyone else? Hope there is good news with everybody!

Thanks for the update Aitan!

Whoa your grandma is a trooper! I've read that c-diff stuff is really hard to combat.

Minus the bad news about MIL's brother it's been about same old same old.

Kat

Aitan, I'm glad your grandmother is taking the change well.

Update--MIL is suddenly in a wonderful mood, I'm amazed and pleased. No criticism of family, pain complaints, she's joking with us and looks happy for the first time in a while. As per my post above, in mid-April she had a good bit of anger and confusion. Both seem to be abating.

We had lunch out today, and she exclaimed 'That's why!!' and I asked 'That's why, what, Baa?' 'Chickens run and play outside in the sunshine, MMM-MMM, that's what makes them taste so good!' Totally cracked me up. I'm happy for the change and am praying it lasts a while.