Hello all, I'm wondering what to do about this...my MIL finally stopped calling me at all hours, but tonight a friend of hers started calling. Our number is unlisted, but MIL gives it out all over the place, as much as I've begged her not to. Well, I just got a call,

K:'Hello, it's K'
Me:'Oh hello, how are you?Have you been well?'
K:'I heard your son graduated with great marks and is going to work at ******* from April,
congratulations'
Me:'Thank you very much!'
K:'Why did you call me? Did you need to talk to me?'

Whoops! I said 'I think I received the call' without thinking and K started getting all fluttery, so I said 'You were probably going to call MIL and hit my number on speed dial instead'(they are best friends).

'I did! I remember now!'

So I kind of patched it over for now, but what do I say to her if she starts making those all-too-typical midnight phone calls? She did at one point after eye surgery when she was temporarily disoriented, called between 2 and 4 am, but that was 2 years ago. If she is going to start a cycle of this tonight, what can I do? I know I'd like to sneak into her house and erase my phone number but I KNOW that's not an option (don't worry!)

Wee bit alarmed I am.....

If I knew her well enough to get into her house, I'd probably make it an option, Crella. After getting into the house, you will then have to figure out how to get her phone to delete your number.

You don't need to be getting early morning calls.

She lives with her son, who's a caregiver in a nursing home. He probably doesn't know what she's doing. I'm going to try and figure out how to contact him, without tipping off poor K, she feels bad when she does this and gets all confused. I'd like her son to delete my number. I don't know him at all though. I'll try to think about how to get around this.

It's always the same, 'Hi it's K' then I swear not 10 seconds later 'Why did you call me at this hour?' She must forget that she dialed the phone while she waits for me to pick up. I feel sorry for her, she was a school teacher and a real pillar of the community, she was teaching craft classes at the city community center until last fall.

I think I'll find out which home he works at and visit him there.

Ten seconds sounds about right Crella. That's about how long they can remember. Maybe when K calls and then asks why you called, you can tell her you need to talk to her son. This would depend on how late she calls you.
Maybe he could just disconnect her phone when she goes to bed. If she's calling you, she may also be calling others.

Bill, my husband, was also a teacher. He taught the lower grades for 35 years.

A suggestion on posting, Crella, if you post everything in General Discussion you will get more response. I don't know about others but I generally don't scroll down any further than that when I come on.
You can say or ask anything there. Any topic is discussed right there.

I don't know if I really welcomed you to the forum. If not, Welcome. Everyone here is like family only more willing to help.

I hope to see you around a lot. It's good to just come on and talk. It doesn't always have to be about AD. I know it's hard to believe sometimes but if we look hard enough, we even find something to joke about once in a while.

I think I read you're from Japan. Is that right? Hows the weather there now? We are just being teased with maybe getting rid of all our snow and cold weather. I think it is going into the high 40s today but then next week it may be back down to the teens again. I love the spring and summer and am anxiously awaiting their arrival.

Thank you. Right, I am in Kobe. I was born in Boston, I married my penpal! I've been in Japan 29 years this June.

I didn't know whether to post this here or there and elected to post it here You've given me good advice, and posting it has given me a chance to think things over.


I could ask for her son, that's a good idea. This past call was 10:30, the ones after her eye surgery two years ago were 2, 3, 4 in the morning. Her eye surgery didn't go well, her eye got infected and they told her she might lose it...she was beside herself and it takes a LONG time to eradicate infection inside the eyeball, so I know she was going through hell and I expected the calls to end eventually as her stress was alleviated . She stopped calling me after a week or so,and hadn't called again until Friday night.

Our weather is all over the place right now. We had a week of high 40s and torrential rain, and then we had snow yesterday, and it's supposed to be 55 today. At least it's finally sunny, I was about to build an ark! Spring is nice here, quite warm, but summer is hell, temps in the high 80s to mid-90s with 85-90% humidity. We also have a rainy season for six weeks starting in mid-June.

The weather you're having sounds just like ours right now. One day it's in the 40's even got into the high 60's one day, then it will go down into the 30's or lower.
I've thought about the ark, we have had a lot of rain. But I guess that's better than the snow. I'll be so glad when this winter is over.

I could ask how the pen pal worked out but afte 29 years I guess you made a good decision. How did you get a pen pal from Japan in the first place? It must have been a hard decision to leave the US and move to Japan. Do you have family there and do you get back to the States ofter?

Nosy, aren't I?

I hope you get the phone calls taken care of.

No, you're not nosy!

A friend in high school had one, and she sent my name over to the office that found hers for her, and about two months later I got my first letter. We hit it off right away and wrote for five years, met, and got married two years after that.

We lost my Dad to cancer three years ago, my mother, sister, and her daughter all live together in MA. I'm getting back as often as I can, Mom's 77 this year.

After the first couple this weekend there have been no more. Perhaps a conversation with MIL triggered it, as she called to offer her congratulations on our son's graduation. I expected them to continue like they did last time,but so far, so good.

It all sounds so romantic. Meet and marry your pen pal of five years and live happily ever after.
Now I'm not only nosy but a dreamer, too.

I'm glad the phone calls stopped, let's hope they don't start again.

I almost missed your reply. When I come on, I always check to see if there are any new posts here. For some reason this topic wasn't lit up to indicate"new post". By chanci I saw your name as the last poster and decided to check. Lo and behold there was your post.

Let's move to general discussion so we don't miss each other. If there is something you don't want others to see, you can click on my name and then click PM. By doing that you can talk to anyone you want without others seeing what you write.
I do that when I want to leave my email address or my phone number with someone.

I'll see you in general discussion.