Lots of caregivers face this dilemma. Early in my mom's disease, she was one of many who did not want to take a bath. Here are a few things that worked for me when I would visit her and try to help out.

- Don't ask if the person would like to take a bath. Just gives them a chance to say, "No!" Gently, calmly try, "It's time to take your bath now" and lead them to the bathroom.

- Act like it's no big deal. If you feel anxious, chances are your loved one can pick up on that and it makes the process more difficult.

- Have everything out and ready so all the person has to do is get in. Towels, soap, shampoo, fresh new clothes, and the water running already and at a good temp.

- Tell your loved one each thing you are doing to help them feel secure. "I'm going to take your socks off now" etc.

- Offer to help wash their back, etc.

- Sense of humor helps. Try making a joke or telling a story they enjoy.

- Try to add in some positives such as doesn't the soap smell good.

- Bath chair or no-slip stickers for safety.

- Any time my mom would comply I'd thank her and tell her she was a big help.

- Try compliments. I'd try telling Mom she had such pretty hair, etc. Anything to make it a good experience.

- When done, give them a hug.

- I knew a man who advised that he always took off his glasses first. He learned the hard way when his Mom would try to hit him.

- If you don't succeed in getting them in the tub, tomorrow's always a new day.

Feel free to add on to this!

Starry,

Thanks so much for that. I always ask my mom, do you want to take a shower? Never thought of doing it that way. Something so simple huh? That's why I love it here. Everyone always has the very best advice.

Jackie

When all else fails, try disposable premoistened washcloths. You can even put the whole package in the microwave to warm them up a bit.

I had my mom leave on a t-shirt on so she could feel covered (and protected from drafts) and talked her through each step. We went through several washcloths before we were finished. Then I handed her clean clothes, she dressed herself, I talked her into switching out her shirt for a clean one, and we were done.

Now she's in assisted living and they just tell her when it's time to take a shower, and she does it. Go figure.

Thanks for the tips! Sponge baths can be also used in between showers and baths. In the advanced stage of dementia, bed or sponge baths may be the only choices you have.