I'm going to care for Mom & Tom, again! I'm booked to be there from May 5th-May19th. My Sister answered, when I last called, and pretty much told me that their entire Care-Team had fallen apart. Eva had to run off to the Philippines, again, to care for HER parents, and one Caregiver got her Nursing Degree, so is looking for a new job. Understandably, her pay will go from $25.00 per hour to $110.00. My Sister and I are still not speaking, but we had to. It was so UNPLEASANT, I have an In-Home-Care Org, all lined up, 2 blocks away, and she WILL-NOT-BUDGE??? She says they have too many people, but not enough care? I asked her how Mom's blood sugar was, and she said "Not great!" How is Tom, Worse?" "YES!" They both need MORE than 4 hours a day care! Really, ya think????

O.K. So, I am all about solutions, and I am not one bit sure, what she is about. They let the Non-Nurses, give Mom her shot, and when I asked, how they were doing it, she said she HAD-NEVER-WATCHED? Even though she has been there for 12 days? So, I really don't get it, or her, so I am going, and will do what ever I feel best, which may be to go directly to a Judge, bypass the District Attorneys Office, Social Services, APS, and hope to God, he has a heart, beating in his chest. I may try to get custody, and bring her home with me, with or without their blessings! Tricky, possibly dangerous, and I don't think I can do it if Mom insists on staying with Tom. She thinks everything is fine, as per usual. I don't even know how I am going to get to the Airport. I don't have a dime, or any available credit, but I AM GOING!

All Prayers Welcome, for me to try to think calmly, & clearly, & do the best thing for my poor Mom. I am so stressed out, already even thinking about it, even thinking about having to stay, once again, in that Hell-Hole.

Please Pray for me. If not for me, for my poor Mother. ;-(

One more thing. My Sister, who is: A) A Doctor, & B) Has Mom's POA of Health said: "Mom's Insulin Injections are not that important!" I kid you not? Let's see, Coma & Death, if she get's too much. Stroke or Heart Attack, if she doesn't get enough? So in who's WORLD, is this not important? I really think I need to have her deemed incompetent. So I have to have Mom, Tom, AND my Sister, deemed unable to care for themselves, and or, each other. That shouldn't be too HARD????

She also told me once, that Mom's afternoon meds, were not that important either??!!?? I have that one in writing, in an E-Mail! Is she completely insane? Or does she want my Mom to die?

I hope your trip goes well Sky. All you can do is all you can do. Enjoy your visit with your mother and good luck with everything else.

Thanks Joyce. I found the Home Health Care Company this morning, that I had spoken to before. (Really Nice, Maxim) Mom's husband, is a Veteran, and they also have a 'quick let's get him 45 hours care per month' partner. Can you leave me, their link, or phone number? "The Veterans Administration" I know the regular way, can take forever, and I don't have his Social Security number, BUT, I will call his Daughter. He needs to pay for this extra care! He has been getting a FREE ride, on Mom's, LTHC, for four years! I don't think it is even close to FAIR, for Mom to have to pay $6,000.00 per month, to live in that DUMP!

I really hope things turn around before it's too late. I can't imagine what it would be like to be in your shoes. I was lucky in that my mother lived within walking distance from me and all my sibling seemed to think that Joyce would take care of everything. If they had tried to interfere, I'm afraid there might have been some problems. But everything was left up to me and everyone was happy to leave it that way.

Are his kids around and what do they have to say about the way things are?

Have a good trip Sky and good luck on everything.

Praying for you, Sky. Once you're there, I hope everything can fall into place. Things are ever-changing with this disease and sometimes it's one brick wall after another, but all we can do is be strong, keep at it, and do the best we can.

Keep your chin up and enjoy your Mom. Will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Best of luck to you!

Thank-You Joyce, & Same U. I talked with my sister again, yesterday, just before she left, and she has bumped up their care, to eight hours per day, and is still against me hiring "Maxim" I'm not sure why. She seems MORE concerned about Mother's safety, than her money, for a change. I still don't want to see my Mom, footing the entire bill, for her husband, but we don't seem to agree on that either. She (My Sister) is TOTALLY against Assisted Living, which is discouraging, of course! I think the best thing for both of them, would be to sell that house,(worth a lot, even though disgusting!) and move into assisted living, together. It would give my Mom time to adjust, and I think she would do very well. She is very social, and still enjoys Line-Dancing & Bridge, etc. If they started there together, they would be the envy of every resident! But, that is just a plum dream, so not sure why I even think about it.

One bit of GOOD news? BOTH of my Sisters have been trying to arrange that my Mom stay in that dump, even after Tom dies??? By begging his Daughter. She gave her a flat "NO-WAY!" I figured she would, and I am glad. She (Tom's Daughter) is even more heartless, and selfish, than my Sister is. In this case, it paid off. I want my Mom OUT-OF-THERE as soon as possible! His daughter can barely wait til' he dies, so she can sell that place, for a Million Bucks, and it will be leveled, within one week. There was some concern about liability, but I am sure the biggest reason rejection, was GREED!

I probably will not 'kidnap' my Mom, but I sure would like to. She still likes it there, and I would be hard pressed, to drag her away, in tears. Once Tom passes, which could be any minute, Mom's POA of Finance plans to put Mom into a crappy Nursing Home. Since Mom still holds her own POA of her body, she may decide she'd rather come live with me, even in the bitter cold, than land in a Nursing Home, with no one to visit her??!!! I can't even imagine, how horrible that would be.

I'll keep you posted! Thank You for your support!

Keep us informed on how things are going Sky.
I am heading north tomorrow so I won't be around as often but often enough to keep in touch.

Dear Nancy,
I hope things go as well as possible for you when you get there - once you can see with your own eyes what's really going on.
This stuff can drive us crazy so - take it one day at a time.
Wishing you all the best.
Take care
Eileen

Have a good trip, Nancy. My heart breaks for all you are going through and I wish I had some way to help you, something I could say or do to make your burden lighter. One thing I do know is that you are a terrific advocate for your mom and she couldn't have anyone more dedicated or loving in her corner. You're the BEST

Spend lots of time loving on mom and takes lots of pics..........I love seeing your mom's beaming face when she's looking at her best daughter.

Hey Sky,

I hope you're managing to sort some things out and resolve a few issues. Have you made any progress on the home health care? We're all crossing our fingers for you.

- Jezza