I thought it was me, but maybe not....

Today I moved my work equipment from the basement upstairs to my room so I could be closer to all the activity. I asked mom if she was happy about that and she said she was...after a couple of tries as to why, she said that she'll "be able to check on me more."

I am getting used to listening to dictation with the sound of endless episodes of Forensic Files blasting away in the living room. [/b]

You didn't know? She's looking after you.

My mom worried about me all the time.....was I eating?.....was I getting enough sleep?.....near the end, I would sit next to her bed and lay my head down and she would wake up and very gently put her hand on my head and caress my cheek.

So, even though most traces of her personality were gone, she was still "mothering" me to the end.

I miss her so much.

Today's the first day in months, probably a year, that I literaly laid down most of the day and slept on and off. I have a terrible cold with the headaches, aches, pains etc.

My mom was so motherly today also. I'd wake up from a little catnap, and say Mom, you ok? I'm fine, just keep on resting, don't worry about me so much.

When it was dinner time, my husband made himself an omlette, she made herself a sandwich, and I still was resting.

Oh what a glorious day. Not that I wanted to be sick, but I found out also that she still "mothers" me. Felt good.

Jackie

Yes, the mothering does seem to come and go, mostly go. I think because as they regress, you know how teenagers are very self centered, (I know I was!) anyway....yea, it is so nice when they 'zoom' back into focus.

Karen. That just breaks my heart, because the last Good-Bye I said to my Mom, in person, was laying on her bed next to her, and she was almost in tears, and I was mothering her? I was stroking her hair, behind her ear? And guess where I got that from, you bettcha! She was an awesome Mom!

A funny. When Mom still had her Condo, and I say she was in the 'tween' state, sharp enough to know something was wrong, but kind of beligerent about it too.

I'd asked her is she was afraid of me leaving because of, you know, her 'memory' problem??? I had spent about 10 hours a day it seemed, fixing problems, finding things, chasing down Doctors, or whatever, she REALLY kept me BUSY?

So, she said ...Drum Roll...I think she actually had her hands on her hips, and she said "Bad things ONLY happen, when YOU are here!" "OUCH!" I knew it wasn't true, but boy did it smart, because I knew SHE believed it?

Dad always had this surprising capacity to kind of pull himself together for a short time if he absolutely had to. Sometimes it was disconcerting because he could seem so normal to some people.

But sometimes if he knew I was having a particularly bad time or if I was really sick, then he would kind of care for me.

It was always the most touching thing because I know it must have taken so much effort from someplace so deep inside him to do that.

Judy,
At least your Mom is keeping a good eye on you.. BFM used to think I was the hired help.. I can't tell you how many times I have been fired.. ha ha Yet I still keep showing up for work every morning!!!!! LOL


Sky: I know how that last statement must have strung pretty bad. BFM told me one time that the only reason she couldn't do anything for herself was because I wouldn't let her!!!!!!!!!! Oh like my life mission was to take over wiping her butt for her!!!!! I know what she meant but while I was up to my elbows in poop was not the time to say that.. LOL Heavy sigh..

Almost every day, I ask mom what was good about today, what was bad about today and she says what she thinks.

One day I must have felt like living dangerously, so I asked the usual questions and then I went on to ask:

JUDY: What's good about me?
MOM: You're nice.

JUDY: What's bad about me?
MOM: YOU'RE FAT.

I don't ask that anymore!!!! LOL LOL LOL

Neither would I Judy, or at least only "what's good"

At least you catch on quick.. ha ha

Judy, I recieved a similar comment from my MIL when I was VERY pregnant with my last son. I told her I was gonna have a baby...she said, No, you are just eating too much!

"Your Fat!" That is sooo funny! Sometimes they are blantantly honest! Like kids!

I have put on a few LBS. it is true (well about 25! I am 52, no more a teenager!) and I ws laying back in "HER" reliner, and we were talking about weight gain, or loss, or something like that. And she says "Well, you are only FAT around your stomach!" OUCH! It's true, but still, ouch!

My 'old' Mother would have told me I was beautiful, if I had a third eye appear in the middle of my forehead, and tenacles growing off of me!

As Lori says, sometime you just gotta laugh!

I had a touch of the aches and pains of flu the other day. It only lasted for a couple of days but I found myself wanting my mom. She always knew how to make things better.

Of course you did Snick. Everyone misses their Mommy, when they are sick. I know a friend of my Mom's who is 60-70, and she says she still misses her Mom? I don't know if we every stop? But I do know it get's easier to live with. I hope you are feeling better!

And good to see you here!

Snik: I know what you mean. This for some reason has been a really tough week-I have cried almost every day-not all day but now & then through out the day. Not sure why but just feel really blue.

I was on my way home from a clients house & and as I was leaving she told me she Loved Me-I said Thank You & I Love you too. Then I really missed my mom. All the ladies I work for are nice just not mom. And they will never be "mom". Lordy I feel like a lost child.

I just so wish I could look over at her chair and see her sitting there.